Chancing Fate

the feelings in my stomach have just moved to my head.
i wonder...is this real? can these feelings be led?
can i really care this much this soon?
should i tell him the truth or just let him assume?
is fate the cause of my troubled heart?
or did i misinterpret...did i have a part?
sometimes i feel as if my heart will burst
and he still won't be here...and i'll still be hurt
but what if he doesn't care like i want him to?
what if i am just a friend, surely that will do
then i would get to keep him as my very own
but then i wouldn't get to hold him when the nights are long
oh what do i do with these feelings i have?
do i send them away? do i call them a cab?
do i send them back to wherever they came?
and hope they don't return to bring me more pain
i can't do that because surely i wouldn't survive
and my heart would stil hurt and i would still cry
and i would always wonder if he cared the way i did
and i would never know if it was pain that he hid
if maybe he cared and we would be together one day
and then my problems would just melt away
i would finally hold the one fate wanted me to hold
and there he would be and we would grow old
and i would live a life fullfilled because of fate
because losing him is a chance i can't take
so i will tell him and maybe he'll see
that right here with me is where he needs to be

Written: 2002